an eternal family

there is something wonderful to know that 

the lord blessed us with the opportunity to have an eternal family. 

this past year was one of the hardest testimony testers for me. 

in may, i had to say goodbye over the phone, 

from 3000 miles away to a beloved grandfather. 

and just this december i never got to meet a wonderful little cousin.

there is something heartbreaking about two funerals in one year. 

one for a man who got to live a full-ish life and a man who never got to live. 

but somehow, there is a peace that lives in my heart. 

a knowledge and conviction that my family can be together forever 

allows me to put one foot in front of the other 

and not be a hot mess of emotions and grief. 

grandpa is waiting for us. 

he's preparing the mansion in heaven that we will all share. 

and little sam is there with grandpa, 

learning as a child should 

from such a wonderful role model. 

and sometimes i get a little jealous of the angels.

but it helps the aching heart to know that they are happy.

my soul was racked with eternal torment;
but i am snatched, and my soul is pained no more.

this was the scripture that we found open in the days

after my grandfather's funeral.

there were probably some of his last words

he read from the scriptures before his death.

and what a powerful statement.

my soul is pained no more.

looking back on that week, and the letter i wrote

home, i realized that i was being prepared well

before i even knew something was astray.

i had been studying in the book of mormon

and reading in the doctrine and covenants

about what happens to man after he leaves this life.

and what a comfort this scripture still is to me:

and the next verse says: 

and then shall it come to pass, that the spirits of those

 who are righteous are received into a state of happiness,

which is called paradise, a state of rest, a state of peace, 

where they shall rest from all their troubles 

and from all care, and sorrow.