| my soul was racked with eternal torment; but i am snatched, and my soul is pained no more. |
a girl living in a state of friends, family, and beauty. a few of my rants, ramblings, and daily experiences i have deemed share worthy.
January 10, 2017
an eternal family
August 31, 2016
well, hello there
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| photo creds to darrin perryman photography |
and thanks to weekly emails, i somehow survived the
eighteen month sabbatical from daily life.
lots of pictures, and lots of spanish vocabulary words,
made the adventure interesting to retell.
but this time, i got to be there, and that was special.
i am now back to school, trying to get my lazy butt
excited to be at school again.
i have some good motivation hanging over my head,
so there isn't much time to waste.
rae got married to a cute guy named prince eric
and they are great. waay cute couple.
it's a plus that they live a few blocks away too.
bug went to the other blue school
and we have to learn to love the weird again.
#showmethescotsman
russman got big. watch out world.
a stud muffin is a cooking.
chris is as tenderhearted as ever,
and has become quite the little adventurous one.
still holds out for the football player dream,
but there may be some growing that has to happen first.
hannah is the little princess.
she's the only little girl left in the house
and i don't think she will let her brothers forget it, either.
spencer is into everything sports,
which really isn't new to me.
the kid can't think straight if it's not raining outside.
he loves playing outside...
i love my family and i can't believe that
we made it through eighteen months.
congratulations family.
we rock.
October 27, 2014
home!
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| the gorgeous nauvoo temple. rebuilt in all its pre-fire glory. |
September 6, 2013
something hard
The hardest thing of college so far? Missing all of the firsts. (wow, that sounded motherly.) But seriously, I miss seeing my brothers and sister off to their first day at their new schools. I missed the first day of seminary. And the hardest thing? Missing my parents' 19th wedding anniversary.
Nineteen years ago, on Tuesday, September 6, 1994, my parents were sealed for time and all eternity in this beautiful building:

And this was my parents sometimes. But not always really. It was more along the lines of hugging her from behind and finding that ticklish spot and tickling her just to see her cringe and laugh. Along the lines of hello and good-bye kisses, no matter how much of a rush he is in to get to work. Along the lines of apologizing after the fight. Along the lines of being excited about sitting next to her at meals after almost fifteen years of sitting at opposite ends of the table because she can't stand hitting his outstretched feet under the table. It's really in all the little things.
And most of all, thank you Daddy for loving my mother like Sis. Dalton taught in this talk:
July 29, 2013
moved out
but life will get better once I get my feet on the ground. I found a job, at a local grocery store. I am currently a bagger, but will hopefully being learning the ropes of cashier here soon. I love it so far. It kind of stinks when your feet and knees and hips go numb from standing in pretty much the same position for eight hours, but I am hoping that a trip to the local Wal-Mart and a Dr. Scholl's will help that out.
church is interesting, because i am fresh meat in town and all of the men are off their missions, dating a girl, and/or are too old for me to fathom right now. I know that it won't be better once school starts, but hopefully there will be some more girls closer to my age when that happens. i want to get settled here, but right now the whole stake is combined into one meeting right now, so it's kind of hard to find new people. a lot of the people are just waiting for their housing contract to be up so that they can move into a new ward... rough life. it's kind of hard because I want to find people my age, but I know that's close to impossible because they are all serving the Lord. I hope that I don't go two years without going on a date. Ugh, that would be awful on all sorts of levels.
let me just say this. living with your great grandmother sounds like a great idea and a great opportunity to get to know her a little bit better. and let me tell you, it has been really cool to spend some time with her and talk to her about her earlier life. but sometimes it's just plain rough. at about nine o'clock every night, I am in my room watching a movie on Netflix or watching one I rented from Redbox. She doesn't have more than some granola, toast with peanut butter and honey, or a smoothie for breakfast and doesn't have the fixings for much else. She eats things WAAAYY past expired out of her food storage and eats vegetables like they are going out of style. Don't get me wrong, it's been interesting to see all of the different ways you can make a green salad, but the otherwise light main courses are a little rough to eat sometimes. I mean, she doesn't eat meat. Canned chicken, a little bacon, and some tuna is all I have seen her make/eat in the three weeks I have been here. Where's the BEEF!?
I love her, but seriously, the generation gap may be a little much on this one.
June 18, 2013
time to grow up
I am going to miss Tennessee. All of the friends, all of the family that I have made and have come to love, sentenced to a 1700 mile restraining order. It’s going to kill me. I love Tennessee. I can honestly say that I never thought I would say that. When I moved here in 2002, Tennessee was just going to be place #2 on the Map of My Heart. But now, Tennessee is number one. And it will always be. I’m officially a Tennessee Girl. Born in UT, but raised to love UT. It’s great to be a Tennessee Vol. Yes it is. Tennessee will always be a beautiful place. The rain, the wonderful shrubbery; all of it have no parallel. To be able to look out over one hill and see the next one, it’s all just so amazing. I thought when I was little that it was all one bad roller coaster, but man was I wrong. It’s all one beautiful valley that I get to call “Home” for forever more. “Never Let Go.” how fitting. You have to learn how to hold onto the past and learn from it. Never let go of those things that are important to you. Never let go of the values that you hold to be true. Never let go of your zeal for life. “Never letting go;” so much better than “YOLO” or any other lame catch phrase from this decade.
Live is going to be so different in the next couple of months. You talk about growing up fast. We leave for “life” in 18 days. And I don’t think that I am ready. I want to live in the security of home. I want to be able to see mom and dad every day. I don’t want to have to deal with all of the scary real life things: debt, living on my own. There are a few things that I can’t wait for though: to be a wife, to be called “Mommy,” and to be in charge of my own home. I want it so bad, but for some reason I know that it won’t be happening right away. The Lord has funny ways of revealing things to us, and I just have a feeling from reading my patriarchal blessing, from babysitting smaller children, and from being with my own siblings. I know that my husband and I will have some sort of teary good-bye. I will have some adorable children. I want this future, but at the same time I am so not ready for it. I want to be a child forever but I’m ready to grow up. When did decisions become so life-altering?! Goodness!
June 3, 2013
it’s been said
It takes a village to raise a child. And I always had an inkling of what that meant, until recently when I saw how true that statement really is. There are so many people who have touched my life and have helped me grow. All of the teachers, all of the coaches, all of the church members, all of the neighbors, all of the friends and all of the family members. It all adds up to a rather impressive village. And I just wanted to thank all of the village people for the wonderful woman that you have helped create.
Thank you to all of the teachers who have helped me learn the importance of an education and for guiding me to what I will be studying in college and will be going to school to become “when I get older".
Thank you to all of the coaches who have helped me to learn the importance of hard work and dedication. Even if I kicked and screamed while I did it.
Thank you to all of the church members who have helped me gain a testimony of the truthfulness of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. For giving me great Sunday School lessons and Young Women lessons that helped me gain such a strong testimony that can be boiled down to FIVE things:
- God lives and loves EACH and EVERYONE of us. Regardless of our misdoings.
- Jesus Christ suffered for us and the Atonement is real. Through Christ and His ultimate Atonement, we can return to live with Heavenly Father and Christ again.
- The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ is what it says it is: Another Testament of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.
- Joseph Smith, Jr. was a divine prophet who truly saw our Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ and restored the fullness of the Gospel of Jesus Christ unto the Earth that we may all have the Gospel again.
- Thomas S. Monson is the true prophet of God and runs His church on the Earth today. President Monson and his counselors help the people of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and guide us so that we can return to our Heavenly Father.
Thank you to all of the neighbors who really were my village. Thank you for all of your sincere concern and care for me. It truly means the world to have good neighbors.
Thank you to all of the friends who have created a tight bond and have become my surrogate family. Thank you for making me feel loved and making Tennessee a home away from home. (Although, now Tennessee really IS home.)
Thank you to all of the family members who were my closest friends. Thank you for the countless memories and love that you have showered me in. Words can not express my love for you.
THANK YOU FOR MAKING A GREAT VILLAGE.
April 16, 2011
home improvements
for the last three years my dad has been working on the west side of our house (ie the kitchen) expanding the kitchen. the project started back in the spring of 2008 when my dad broke down the wall between the kitchen and the family room. that was then. now we have twice the kitchen space, a HUGE island, a longer L-shaped counter, hardwood floor throughout the downstairs, a fruit room, a covered patio, and a longer garage.
YEA!!
but wait until you hear what else we still have to do:
trim
flooring in the mudroom
all the sanding and mudding of the drywall in the mudroom
countertops
all on the to-do/honey-do list. it is quite long when you break it down. my dad is hoping to have all the trim done by the summer. maybe. depends on the budget i think.
but the kitchen looks great and my mom currenty has more drawer space than she knows what to do with. quite literally. i can not tell you how many times i have caught myself going to the pantry for a plate, cup, or bowl in the last week or so. it is going to get some getting used to for sure.
January 3, 2011
christmas and the new year
opened my gift from santa and was excited, my OWN umbrella, but then i was prompted to open the umbrella upside down. turned out that santa made it rain money! in between each individual prong, was a five dollar bill. so if you counted thats five prongs, so ten bills x five bucks = $50!! yep, i was allowed 50 dollars to go and spend on clothes that were badlly wanted and needed, mind you. monday i went and shopped the after christmas sales with rachel and i purchased a waist belt, a flowly sweater, and two new pairs of jeans (thank you old navy and jcpenney's!!) after our excursion, i then went to oldnavy.com and spent an addition 30 dollars on some fashionable scarves that were not in the store. they arrived thursday afternoon which is impressive seeing how i got the cheapest shipping (5-7 days). rachel was a little upset because she ordered a dress from downeastbasics.com on christmas that took until friday to show up. she was a little mad when i showed her my scarves to say the least. hahaha :)
the new year has been good to me so far. i spent the count down to the new year talking to my friend-boy that i would really like to be my boyfriend but there are age requirements on my side that prohibit that until my 16th birthday. haha cant wait for that! im only 6 months away from it! the old year was not exactly. the day before new years eve i was supposed to babysit this adorable little girl from the neighborhood while her parents went to a bowl game in nashville. unfortunately i got sick an hour before the job started and was forced to pass it to my sister. ugh i was soo not happy about doing that. but i didnt want to take the chance of getting her sick as well. luckily after a long, needed nap i felt better and was able to help in laying the hardwood in kitchen addition.
thats right! you heard me right!! the boxes that have been stacked in the living room for about a year, have finally been ripped open and the glue/sealant has been bought and both have been ripped into as we have started applying hardwood to the entire downstairs. as of the moment we have successfully floored the kitchen and family room and have crossed our way into the entry way and our small hall closet. we are down to the bottom of our fifth! (yes 5th!!) 5-gallon bucket of sealant/glue and are going to have to scrap to finish whats left of the hallway. needless to say, my father will be purchasing about three more buckets at lumber liquidators in the next couple of days. we still have about 15 boxes left of hardwood to use in the dining and living rooms that my dad thinks we wont need. we will just see how far they get us. it officially looks like we are moving if you are to look in through the downstairs windows, and taking everything with us. we have evacuated every piece of furniture, accessories, and more into the garage, fruit room, mud room, and shop as possible in order to make the rooms scarce and easy to empty when we shift rooms. needless to say, the house is an udder pig stye as me, my mom and dad, and rachel work our tails off to finish as much as possible before my dad goes back to work tomorrow. but unfortunately, that wont work seeing how we are down to the bottom of the glue. we will have to resume work tomorrow.
in the mean time, im getting ready for school! i cant believe im saying this, but im getting tired of the break! all the house work and the mindless hours of sitting down doing nothing are killing me and i cant wait to have something productive and educational to do. that is my life!! as you can imagine with all the house work, my social life has been paused in order to help, so i cant wait to see all my friends again. yipee!!
umm new years resolutions.. earn so mula! be more loving and helpful; make a list of things i will need for college and work on the little things (sheets, a quilt, a scrapbook of memories, my own clothes [none of the sharing business anymore], a cookbook, and things like that); get another honor bee (i had my interview yesterday and im getting it presented next week! im ecstatic! i finished the book of mormon on friday); and maybe build up a library of books for the college life. who knows its all news to me!
thursday begins the new semester for school and i will go into honors chemistry, lifetime wellness, accounting one, and concert band. wellness is like health and gym combined, so its pretty much a joke. and chemistry is going to be interesting, but seeing how i had algebra two last semester its supposed to be easier. (hopefully!!!)
November 26, 2010
thanksgiving weekend
wednesday we didnt have any mutual so rachel snapped the opportunity to have a party. a just-for-the-heck-of-it party. we ended up having two dozen people show up to the house at one point and we had a lot of fun. we played catch phrase, capture the flag, mafia (upon popular request *cough*cough* **barrett** *cough*cough*), and then we settled down with The Princess Bride. yes possibly the greatest movie of all time... and ive only seen it three times. i know i know what a shame...
thanksgiving was a blast. the church girls got together to play powder puff football at the high school and it was a lot of fun. we were playing touch until becker showed up with flags which turned out to be soo much better. our team turned out to be significantly better at defense than offence. what a shame. ahaha but we still had fun. we had a family friend the raineys over for dinner and some horse play aka motorcycle riding for the little boys and some chatting for the female. hahaha sadly i must admit that the tom boy came out in me and i spent my time watching the rainey boys race around our yard on a couple of small motorcycles. soo adorable. hahahahahaha then we went for dessert to the giacalones and we were going to play games but that didnt work out hahaha too much chatting going on. plus too many people.
and lets see. whats left for this post? o yes! a list of thankful fors....
so i am thankful for...
September 14, 2010
scripture bag
| the finished bag has pleats, two handles, and a huge inside. but no pockets inside!! |
| the two contrasting colors |
April 24, 2010
the best movie since star wars
(shoulder shrug)
April 22, 2010
the house
spring break
monday and tuesday i went with my family and some friends up to wilderness in the smokies and spent the night. i had a lot of fun, even though i dont do roller coasters. one of the newer slides has a ginormous funnel and u drop about a foot into the thing. it is the scariest thing in the entire world when you can't see the drop coming and you actually can see it. i actually prefer to not see both and going down it sideways. it is funnier that way :) the green slide is my favorite though. it is really fast and awesome even though it doesnt have a giant funnel or scary drops or flips in it. one time i went with some parents and a really light nine year old, so we went really fast and really swirly inside the slide. one word describes that ride: awesome! the wave pool was cool too. about every twenty or thirty minutes, the lifeguards press a button that starts a huge wave of water. it is so much fun. i didnt go on the artificial wave that they had there partially because i didn't feel the need to.
thursday night i hung out with katherine at anchor park and then we went to her house and watched she's the man. i am officially in love with that movie. amazing!!!! love amanda bynes as a dude. sooo funny.
friday me and my sister went to a friends house and played a round of pool, watch a few minutes of brian reagon, and played just dance on the wii. we had a bucket load of laughs and had fun being together.
saturday and sunday were general conference and easter weekend so we didnt really have a lot to do expect for stay at home. yes... time to be lazy!
monday was torture because we had to prep to go back to school, eew. not fun, but still enjoyable b/c i didnt do anything






